Living with “In Laws”

Okay granted Edgar’s parents aren’t truly my in laws yet, but it certainly feels like it when you live with them. When we started this about a month and a half ago everything was fine. In fact, besides the immediate culture shock of living in a home where the language spoken is not my own, I felt kind of at home. There house and neighborhood are similar to what I am use to and the bickering with teenage son was comforting. As time has gone on though I have realized that I am not in my own house. What I mean by that is that before I was use to being a grown up in charge of the groceries that came in and out, the life style of the family, and in raising my own child. What I have learned is that when you are in someone else’s house no matter how old you are you feel like a child.

Now, up until this point I was dealing with it better than Edgar. Which is understandable because they are his parents and they push his buttons. One of the big things is how judgmental they are of alcohol. We are not big drinkers but when we decide to have a bottle of wine we finish it that night and we were quite use to having the opportunity to go out every few weeks or so sans baby and reminisce over the fact that we are 22. Loreto and Rosa however do not approve of this. Once Edgar had a high school friend over and we had two bottles of wine. The next day, Loreto told Rosa that he thought “we were going hard”. Not to mention the looks we got when we went out to meet our friend in Dallas one night. Anyway, besides that, most of the frustration has been Edgar’s, with judegements on jobs and clothing choices and things of that nature. This morning that changed.

River has been sleeping horribly the past few weeks and last night was the WORST. First of all I’m sick, like flu and bladder infection sick, second I’m still nursing and at this point it has translated to having a toddler sucking hard on my nipple all night. Last night I couldn’t do it. She had had enough milk and my nipples were sore. So I didn’t let her have anymore, which has happened before, but last night she screamed and screamed. She would fall asleep for an hour and wake up and scream. So much that at six thirty in the morning when Edgar was leaving I gave up and nursed her. After nursing she was awake and I was tired and in pain. So Edgar took her with him to have breakfast so I could sleep. Then she hung out with her Abuela for about half and hour before I got up. When I did get up and drag my self to the living room it was only seven thirty but I apologized any way for making Rosa watch her. And then it happened, she said, “that’s okay, but I have to tell you that me and my husband work inside or not very hard, but Alex(what they call Edgar), works very hard and drives a big truck so I think you need to make River sleep all night. Maybe she should not sleep durning the day. And you should only give her milk in the morning”. Now I don’t react with anger but in my head I was like SERIOUSLY!! Don’t you think I would if I could? Don’t you think I know how hard he works? Do you know I’m sick? And then in real mexican mother form she reminded me that River’s nose was runny and that I needed to keep socks on her at all times.

Okay I am thankful that we have been able to live here rent free while we got our feet of the ground but soon we are getting our taxes back. When we do we are moving out ASAP and let me tell you, I will put River to sleep when I want and how I want, I will let her cry in her room at night if necessary, and if her dad wants to help in the middle of the night, I will let him. One other thing I will most certainly do, I will let her be naked if she wants and I will have a glass of wine while I watch her play.